


There isn't enough Groupchat fics

by LianneVenice



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Crack, F/F, F/M, How Do I Tag, M/M, Not Beta'd, PHICHIT LIKES KDRAMA FITE ME, Viktor and JJ are whipped, Viktor with a K, Yuuri may be calm but he is screaming on the inside, beautiful weird men, chris is ooc but i still like him, dead memes, dry af jokes, forehead jokes, have mercy on me and my dead memes, jj is nice, slow updates because my creativity levels are low, this fic wrote itself
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-09
Updated: 2017-05-10
Packaged: 2018-10-29 19:52:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10860915
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LianneVenice/pseuds/LianneVenice
Summary: shHhHh just read itLeonora: Victor Nikiforov but everytime he's being extra his forehead get biggertake a break from all the angst in this fandom





	1. Why though?

**Author's Note:**

> what is this
> 
> it looks beautiful 
> 
> i know this is bad so i am not going to apologize

 

> **_Chuchumofos added KatsudonFatale, Nickifurry, ElTigre, Chinesedude, Leonora, SwissMilk into the group chat_ **
> 
>  
> 
> **_Chuchumofos changed the group name "Losers lol"_ **
> 
>  

**Chuchumofos** : hOw DaRe YoU kAtSuKi!!!

 **KatsudonFatale** : What did I do????

 **Chuchumofos** : YoU cHeAtEd On Me!!

 **KatsudonFatale** : What?????

 **Chuchumofos** : aftr 2 years of never ending war i come home 2 u succ anther man!! hw dare??

 **KatsudonFatale** : I'm sorry, I'm really confused.

 **Chuchumofos** : dOeS thissss relationship mean nothin 2 u????????¿

 **KatsudonFatale** : First, We're not even Dating. Second, I am engaged and Lastly, I thought you had a crush on....

 **Chuchumofos** : aww i thought u would play along...

 **Chuchumofos** : also continue that sentence and i end ur whole career

 **ElTigre** : pls do

 **Nickifurry** : Yurio, don't be like that.

 **Eltigre** : y is it that everwhere i go u 2 r bein disgusting

 **KatsudonFatale** : ShHHhhhhhhhhhhhhHHhhhhhhhhhHHh

 **Chuchumofos** : ohhhh what do you mean by..."disgusting"?

 **KatsudonFatale** : Phichit, I swear, I will spill.

 **Nikifurry** : FIGHT!FIGHT!FIGHT!

 **Chuchumofos** : Shut up

 **KatsudonFatale** : Shut up

 **Chuchumofos** : eyyyyy

 **KatsudonFatale** : Eyyyyy

 **Chuchumofos** : my soulmate right there~

 **KatsudonFatale** : We are so meant to be~

 

> **_Nikifurry removed KatsudonFatale from the group_ **
> 
>  
> 
> **_Nikiforov changed the group name to "TRAITORS"_ **

 

 **ElTigre** : stahp beeing a drama queen

 **Chinesedude** : Hah "bee"

 **Leonora** : Victor Nikiforov but everytime he's being extra his forehead get bigger

 **SwissMilk** : shit i laughed

 

> **_Nikifurry removed Leonora, SwissMilk and ElTigre from the chat_ **

 

 **Chuchumofos** : ¿y didnt u remove me?

 **Nikifurry** : You deserve to be alone.

 **ChineseDude** : ohhhh burn

 **Chuchumofos** : I came here to have a good time and I'm feeling so attacked rn

 **ChineseDude** : I don't think that's how it goes

 **Chuchumofos** : shHHhhhhHh

 

> **_ChineseDude_** **_added_** **_KatsudonFatale_** , **_Leonora_** , **_Eltigre_** **_and_** **_SwissMilk_**   ** _to the group_**

 

 **Eltigre** : U losers r so boring i m adding bekaa

 **Chuchumofos** : who dafuq

 **Eltigre** added badboialtin to the group

 **Chuchumofos** : ohhhh ur BF

 **Eltigre** : HE IS NOT MY BOYFRIEND!!!!

 **KatsudonFatale** : No one actually said that.

 **Chuchumofos** : BF = Best Friend

 **Leonora** : ¿Why are u so defensive about it?

 **Nikifurry** : Ohh, Yurio has a crush~

 **badboialtin** : You guys do know that I am still here right?

 **KatsudonFatale** : Ah, Sorry. Forgot you were here for a sec. You didn't say anything.

 **badboialtin** : I was looking at the past convos

 **badboialtin** : Who is Phichit's crush?

 **Chuchumofos** : YUURI I SWEAR

 **KatsudonFatale** : Hint: He has black hair and he skates. He's also Asian.

 **Chuchumofos** : I flippity-floppiting hate you.

 **KatsudonFatale** : Lots of Asian skaters have black hair. Me. Georgi. Otabek. Seung-Gil.... You know. Lots.

 **Eltigre** : Georgi isnt asian stupid

 **KatsudonFatale** : Yeah, but guess what? Euroasian

 **Chuchumofos** : Can we just stop talking about my crush?

 **Chuchumofos** : Let's talk about Korean dramas instead

 **Eltigre** : i dont watch kdrama dumbass

 **ChineseDude** : "Korean"

 **Leonora** : "Korean"

 **KatsudonFatale** : "Korean"

 **badboialtin** : It's... Seung-Gil, isn't it?

 **Chuchumofos** : NO. NOPE. NO WAY. I DENY EVERYTHING.

 **SwissMilk** : i didn't know u like him. he doesn't seem like your type.

 **Chuchumofos** : noooppeee my type is black haired, Asian,hot af , likes dogs and skates

 **Eltigre** : we have da same type wtf except da likes dogs part

 **Leonora** : tbh ur types sounds like YUURI lol

 **KatsudonFatale** : What the fuck.

 **Nikifurry** : I KNEW YOU WERE TRAITORS. YOU GUYS WERE TRYING TO STEAL HIM. FIRST CHIHOKO THEN YOUUUU

 **SwissMilk** : Can u maybe chill (maybe watch some Netflix amiright)

 **Nikifurry** : HOW 'BOUT YOU CHILL

 **KatsudonFatale** : I only have eyes for you.

 **Nikifurry** : Awww. ❤

 **Eltigre** : ew u 2 r so disgusting

 **Chinesedude** : I think I have cavities...

 **SwissMilk** : how about we get an unbiassed opinion on who is Phichit's and Yuri's crush

 **Leonora** : wow you actually said something not related to sex or anything

 **SwissMilk** : maybe there is a hidden text there~

 **badboialtin** : ?!???

 

> **_SwissMilk added CanadianKing and QueenIsa to the group_ **

 

 **Chuchumofos** : they r rlly meant 2 be

 **CanadianKing** : Of course.

 **Eltigre** : ugh u added dat guy i wanna leave TOO BAD I DONT HAVE THAT OPTION

 **CanadianKing** : I was planning 2 talk 2 u

 **Eltigre** : save it asshole

 **CanadianKing** : well then.

 **QueenIsa** : he wants 2 apologize

 **CanadianKing** : no I don't.

 **QueenIsa** : yes u do.

 **CanadianKing** : yes I do.

 **Nikifurry** : L.O.L. You are so whipped.

 **Chinesedude** : says you 

 **Nikifurry** : OF COURSE I AM WHIPPED.

 **KatsudonFatale** : Aren't we supposed to ask them something?

 **Nikifurry** : Oh yeah..

 **Leonora** : So who do u guys think Phichit is crushing on

 **Chinesedude** : they have black hair asian likes dogs hot af and they skateeee

 **Nikifurry** : And no, It is not my Fiancé

 **CanadianKing** : shit, uh sorry for language...

 **QueenIsa** : Seung-Gil? I dunno.

 **KatsudonFatale** : ...

 **Chuchumofos** : I guess there is no point hiding it...

 **Chuchumofos** : I do like Seung-Gil. BlAmE tHe KdRaMaS.

 **CanadianKing** : tbh he is hot.

 **KatsudonFatale** : WTF JJ

 **Eltigre** : dafuq

 **QueenIsa** : Not even mad.


	2. I lied there is drama

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> viktor is bitter LeoJi is happening Yurio is triggered phichit pins for a second and Chris is alone

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if the sentence is in a parenthesis ()  
> it means the person is talking to someone or themselves in real life
> 
> if it's in italic it means they're speaking other languages bcuz google translate is unreliable

  
**QueenIsa** : Wow, Must be expensive to get an airport attached to your head, Viktor.

 **Nickifurry** : ??

 **Leonora** : OMG

 **Nikifurry** : but I don't own an airport??

 **Eltigre** : hahahaha

 **SwissMilk** : I think she means your forehead

 **Nickifurry** : WHAT.

 **Chinesedude** : i fell off my bed

 **Leonora** : ngl it is pretty big

 **SwissMilk** : I guess it is expected he is pretty old

 

 **Nikifurry** : What the fuck.

 **KatsudonFatale** : It is actually nice to touch while he's sleeping, kinda of like a crystal ball

 **Chuchumofos** : wooooaahhh wooohhhh what

 **KatsudonFatale** : Whoops. Gotta blast~

 **badboialtin** : that meme is dead

 **Eltigre** : like viktor S career

 **Chinesedude** : ohhhhhh

 **Chuchumofos** : I feel like Yurio only appears when someone is getting burned

 **Eltigre** : offffff course

 **KatsudonFatale** :

 **QueenIsa** :

 **Nikifurry** :

 **Chuchumofos** : welp this got awkward fast

 **SwissMilk** : just how I like it

 **Chuchumofos** : you have an awkward kink?

 **Nikifurry** : QUICK SOMEONE CONFESS THEIR UNDYING LOVE BEFORE CHRIS FINISHES TYPING (be distracted so we can stop talking bout my forehead)

 **ChineseDude** : PHICHIT I LIKE YOU

> **_Leo left the group_ **

**ChineseDude** : BUT I LOVE LEO MORE

 **Chuchumofos** : mmm YESS go get him my sweet Siopao

 **Nikifurry** : What's a "Siopao"?

 **KatsudonFatale** : shh..questions later...I think they're doing a drama..

 **ChineseDude** : b-but how?! it's already too late! he's alread y unfollowing MY other social me dia  
accounts

 **Chuchumofos** : oh shit.. uh.. by the power of scriptwriting and love my friend u can do it

 **Nikifurry** : _you_   _call him your friend but does he really treat you like one?_

 **QueenIsa** : ShhhhUsH you. It's getting to the good part.

 **ChineseDude** : Can I really do it?

 **Chuchumofos** : yes

> **_Chuchumofos added Leonora to the group_ **

**ChineseDude** : LEO

 **Leonora** : What...

 **ChineseDude** : I..I..

 **Eltigre** : HE LOVES YOU ASS

 **KatsudonFatale** : YURIO

 **Chuchumofos** : NOOOO MY CAREFULLY (not rlly) PLANNED DRAMAA

 **Eltigre** : Shut up i always wanted to do this. I had enough of this bullshit with KAtSuKi and Drama queen over there. I FEEL LIKE I AGED 10 YEARS JUST BY WATCHING THEM PINING.

 **Leonora** : you.. you do?

 **ChineseDude** : ..yes..

 **Leonora** : i .. love.. you too..

 **Eltigre** : and they went off to the sunset and got married blah blah blah let me sleep

 **Chuchumofos** : aww even Yurio ships ittt

 **Chuchumofos** : they're making me cry omgg this is so gr8 they make me want 2 be in a relationship

 **Eltigre** : ha. but u still don't have the guts 2 talk 2 mr.mambo jambo

 **Chuchumofos** : who said I can't?

 **Nikifurry** : _*gay gasp*_

 **KatsudonFatale** : Nooo

 **Chuchumofos** : yesss turns out we like the same DRAMAASSS

 **Chuchumofos** : tho I can't believe we're the same age like I thought he was aroun d Yuuri s age and damn those eyebrows tho he also kind of looks like lee min ho u guys know him right? of course not ur not a koreaboo like me but OMG those eyes tho and that voice tho like mmmm YESS

 **badboialtin** : calm ur man boobs ( did I say that right)

 **Eltigre** : not againnn ( I think ur suppose to say tits but that's alright)

 **Eltigre** : why am I surrounded by pining idiots????? what did i doo???

 **Nikifurry** : _Why do you stay then? No one forces you to stay here. There's no 'You can't leave' rule._

 **Eltigre** : 4 blackmail duuhh

 **Nikifurry** : _Really, Is that so Little Kitty? or is it our companionship you seek?_

> **_Eltigre left the group_ **

**Leonora** : WTF JUST HAPPENED

 **SwissMilk** : i don't know i don't speak borscht

 **KatsudonFatale** : Vitya, What did you do????

 **Nikifurry** : I just called him a kitten, that's all (boom he got roasted) 

 **KatsudonFatale** : Why the duck you lyin? Why you always lyin? Omigosh stop ducking lyin?

 **SwissMilk** : ohhh he's in trouble

 **Nikifurry** : ohhh his boyfriend is in Germany and Chris is all alone ohhhh

 **SwissMilk** : well someone's bitter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry not sorry
> 
> otayuri is staying at the onsen and sharing a room bcuz there is no more space in the storage room 
> 
> viktor is an idiot but in my heart he is a genius

**Author's Note:**

> u laugh u lose
> 
>  
> 
> yurio did not leave the group because he wants blackmail material


End file.
